OT: Scripting humour

[anthony baldwin]

After using Linux for 8 years, I am finally getting around to learning 
some shell scripting.

I created the follow script and installed it on my wife's computer to 
run from
/usr/local/bin/found and put a warning icon on her desktop pointing to 
the script.
(she has dual-boot w/XP so she can play Sims2 and stuff, also, I 
configged xscreensaver for BSOD.
She will have no clue what the output of lsof means):

#!/bin/bash

# just playing around...trying to learn scripting.
# author: Tony Baldwin, LinguasOS.org

export DISPLAY=:0.0
zenity --warning --title WARNING! --text "MicroSOFT Windows has been 
found.  Would you like to remove it?"

zenity --warning --title WARNING! --text "MicroSOFT Windows has been 
found on this machine. Windows is likely to harm your computer, crash, 
get viruses, and be easily vulnerable to malware, spyware and other 
intrusions.  It is recommended that you remove it.  Would you like to 
remove it now?"

zenity --title='You better do something!' --list --checklist --column 
"Select" --column "Which is it" TRUE 'Remove Windows now!' FALSE 'No.  
Do not remove Windows'

zenity --question --title='What?!' --text 'Are you serious?'

zenity --title='MAKE UP YOUR MIND!' --list --checklist --column "Select" 
--column "Which is it" TRUE 'Remove Windows now!' FALSE 'Please do not 
remove Windows.'

sudo lsof | zenity --text-info --title "These files will now be deleted" 
--width 600

locate so | tee >(zenity --title "Destroying files!" --width 400 
--progress --pulsate)

locate li | tee >(zenity --title "Reformatting drive!" --width 400 
--progress --pulsate)

xscreensaver

zenity --warning --title "ERROR!" --text "Hard drive contains no data! 
Press Okay to reboot computer.  Press Cancel to attempt system recover."

xscreensaver-command -lock

zenity --warning --title "ROFLMAO!" --text "JUST KIDDING!"

exit


Thankfully, my wife *does* have a sense of humor.
I may have to spend a night on the couch, but,
It's going to be too fun to watch her run this script.

/tony

-- 
http://www.BaldwinLinguas.com - Translation & Interpreting

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mais la langue, aucun homme ne peut la dompter; 
c'est un mal qu'on ne peut réprimer; 
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