Caroline found a sexist joke on her forum, and pointed out that it violated the Ubuntu Code of Conduct. She was right in doing this. Her behavior was appropriate. A discussion followed as to whether or not her observation was correct. Caroline did not participate in this discussion. The poster of the sexist joke was unable to concede that his joke was inappropriate, but he apologized to whomever was offended. The consensus of the people on the forum was that the joke was inappropriate. Why was there a discussion at all? Because nobody at Ubuntu, not even Mark Shuttlesworth, tells the rest of us how to think. We decide for ourselves. The Ubuntu Community respects our individual autonomy, as women and men. The consensus of the people on the forum was that the joke was inappropriate. Apologies were made, not only by the poster, but by many others as well. Caroline did not participate in this discussion. Later, Caroline wrote in her blog, which was syndicated on Ubuntu UK Planet. In it, she used a rather harsh expletive, and in response, she received an anonymous complaint: "I find this post both offensive and rude. Considering your recent reaction to an email on the ubuntu-uk's mailing list. I am shocked that you use such bad language, knowing full well that it will be shown on the ubuntu-uk planet. If you wish to continue being so crude, please remove yourself from the planet." Although one could interpret such a response as baiting her, we all understand that text-based forums, such as email and user-groups are rife with misunderstandings that arise as a result of interpreting written language the same way we interpret speech. We can easily read sarcasm where it does not reside. Anyone who has used the internet for longer than a month has fallen into a bitter dispute over a comment misinterpreted (or accurately interpreted) as a flame, and friends get lost and feelings get hurt by such disputes. The savvy internet user knows that these disputes erupt constantly, and sagely side-steps them when they arise. Even if we were to interpret this comment in the most hostile possible way, the anonymous complaint has merit, even if his suggestion for resolution does not. The objection to her obscene language is appropriate. * Her language was offensive. * To my knowledge, she has not taken the admonition with nearly the grace that she would insist upon in the author of the sexist joke. We are all traumatized and appalled by the threats against Kathy Sierra. To suggest that Caroline is being similarly victimized is disingenuous. It is truly not my intention to upset anyone on this mailing list. I consider everyone on this list to be my colleagues. I would like to believe that, in this post, I have tried to treat all of you with the utmost respect and courtesy. I spent ninety minutes writing this post, and I feel I have been very careful in my deliberate choice of words. Should you choose to reply to this post, I ask that you please react to what I have written as if I spent ninety minutes writing this post, and had been very careful in my choice of words. Jeremy.