Network Monitoring Tool

[Mark]

On Thu, Nov 25, 2010 at 8:41 PM, Cybe R. Wizard
<cyber_wizard at mindspring.com> wrote:
>
> This, "Ric Moore," is naught but an ersatz Wizard!  Do not send him
> your money.  Had he been a /real/ Wizard he would have included not
> only a Wizardly bill[1] but also, and at only a slight additional
> charge, a wizardly Spell Disclaimer[2].
>
> [1] Payment for the applied Patented spell (® to Cybe R. Wizard)
> will be extrac... expected at a time of my own choosing in the
> indeterminate past, present, or future of places known as, and
> including, but not limited to, physical reality As We Know It,
> alternate timelines, parallel universes, "other" worlds, Mystickal
> Realms, internet "chat" rooms, "news" groups, email lists, and
> any and all auxiliary "existences" or "beings," whether physically,
> metaphysically, fictionally, really, intentionally or
> unintentionally extant or not.
> No time limit.
> No exclusions.  No intrusions.
> No inclusions.  No extrusions.
> No iffy, hands, on butts.
> Not to be confused with the Spell Disclaimer (® to Cybe R. Wizard)
> included with your Patented Spell (® to Cybe R. Wizard)
> No deposit, no reruns.  No shoes, no shirt, no cervix.
> No sh**.
>
> [2] Strict compliance to the terms of this spell are mandatory for the
> 48 hours after the commencement of said spell.
> Do not use this spell if you will be operating heavy machinery.
> May cause  blurred vision, hallucinations, feelings of inferiority,
> doubts, debts, depths, drips, dizzy feelings and dry heaves, dysentery,
> deviltry, dyspepsia, and/or dryness of the mouth and mucous membranes.
> NO WARRANTY whether expressed or implied is included.  If you break it
> you get to keep both pieces. This spell is released under the GNU public
> license. You may use, copy, change,  re-release or  forward this spell
> to as many people and as many times as you wish, as long as this
> disclaimer is included. Not for use internally.  Not for use externally.
>  Not for use eternally.  Not for use paternally.
> May contain small parts unsuitable for young children.
> Does  not contain any nutritional value.  May be habit forming.
> Please dispose of container in an approved fashion.
> Not to be used with any other spells, potions, suggestions, ideas, or
> thoughts. Some settling may occur during shipping.
> As with any spell, please consult your Wizard before using.
> For extra assurance please run this spell through a good quality spell
> checker.  One ticket per customer.  Your mileage may vary.
>
I'm keeping this one, and may alter it for my own personal attribution....

:-)