[Ubuntu Oregon] Flyer nearing a wrap

Brian Murray brian at ubuntu.com
Thu Jun 28 22:57:42 UTC 2012


On Wed, Jun 27, 2012 at 01:23:16PM -0700, James Bradley wrote:
> Here's the latest iteration on the flyer project. At this point, unless
> someone can provide more fodder for the verbiage or constructive ideas
> about the layout, I'll just be making minor refinements from here on out.
> 
> Please take a moment to review the publication; Scribus doesn't have a
> spell or grammar checker so be on the lookout for typos or things that
> don't read right. Any feedback is welcome.

'remain committed to educating others' makes it sound like something
happened and commitment wavered which I don't think is the case.  I'd
just go with 'are committed'.

'millions and millions' of people seems strange to me too.  I think
millions gets the point across.

The mention of Debian will be confusing for people just reading about
Ubuntu for the first time.

I believe page one capitalize Open Source and page two does not.

There is a period after 'creative pursuits.' but the sentence carries
on. much like this one.

'hundreds of dollars just try something new' might be missing a 'to'.

I might stick the contact information on both sides as I personally
missed the url in the beginning and then at "the end" was wondering how
to contact the team.

Thanks it looks pretty neat!

--
Brian Murray
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