Understanding people

LP linuxpusher2 at gmail.com
Mon Sep 2 16:16:42 UTC 2013


David,
Can I use this ?
With or with out your name attached, "your call."
Thanks
Chris.
United Way Volunteer


On 2 September 2013 11:20, David M. Pelly <david.pelly at hotmail.ca> wrote:

>  Dear Gord, Colin and Aruna , and to whom ever else it may concern,
>
> The thread that I initiated has  spurred and  stimulated necessary and
> beneficial responses, to expose and bring to light the better standards of
> the people in the group.
>
> Any group is only as good as the sum of it's members.
>
>
>
>
>  I thank you all for speaking up, and making yourself known.
>
>
>
> The true quality of a person is not determined by social veneer.
>
> The true quality of a person is determined when the person is put to the
> test.
>
> The true quality of a person is determined in times of conflict,  and
> adversity.
>
> Do they become part of the solution or part of the problem?
>
> The best ways to determine the true quality, the true character, the true
> colors of a person is to get married to the person, or get into business
> with the person.
>
>
>
>
>
> While I prefer not to make this forum  a place to vent or expose  personal
> problems, (as it usually considered ungraceful or something like that)  but
> at the same time  it is necessary and beneficial for those who are more
> able,  to understand that there are people who are less able.
>
> It is important to know this stuff, no matter in what area.
>
> What is wrong with life ( even families and companies)  is often the
> things that are not talked about.
>
> And they do not talk about them because they do not know how to talk about
> the problem, and are not qualified to to talk about the problem.  And in
> order to have a meaningful discussion about this subject,  it takes a lot
> of the right kind of education.  Otherwise the discussion will not be
> meaningful or constructive. It will actually cause more problems.
>
> That is the dilemma  with such a serious and common problem.
>
>
>
> Even though this is going to be off linear , off  topic, I will do it.
>
> And I may get scorned for this by some.
>
> But life is non linear and every part of life is effected by every other
> part of life in some way.
>
> So there has to be exceptions for every rule.
>
> (And everyone deals with children in some way, whether your own or someone
> else's.  And there is nothing more important than the quality and the
> sanity of the next generation.  Children are little people. They are the
> big  people of tomorrow. I say children, and focus this dissertation more
> for the sake of children,  because I feel more concern for children, than
> adults.  The most difference can be made with addressing children. )
>
> (And this is especially directed to those who are more able and often
> scorn and scoff at, sneer at, or shun and berate the less able.)
>
>
>
> (And this is a huge subject and cannot be clearly and fully explained in a
> forum such as this, but it is so important to know this stuff, that I am
> going to post a brief summary, regardless of what any one says.)
>
>
>
> When ever you are working with people,  you always have to take this into
> consideration.
>
> To effectively work with people,  you have to understand people and their
> minds.
>
>
> This is part of of "people skills".
>
> The more you understand this, the more effective you are in every walk of
> life.
>
> And:  You are always "selling"  yourself.
>
>
>
> Basically we are all only as good as we have been bred and brought up and
> educated.
>
> We are a sum  product of genetics, a conception, and an upbringing.
>
>
>
> Now those of you who are interested in sports, and follow the media,
> should be well aware of the law suits going on now by  players,   who have
> received concussions,    are now suing the leagues for hundreds of millions
> of dollars.
>
> Concussions are very similar to child abuse.
>
> Concussions and abuse cause brain damage.
>
> In plain language these factors cause "stupidity", .......varying and
> relative degrees of stupidity.
>
> Mental malfunction.
>
> Simply and succinctly stated,  stupidity is the relative inability to
> evaluate data.
>
> Intelligence is the relative ability to evaluate data.
>
> Ignorance is the lack of data to evaluate.
>
> Insanity is the relative  inability to determine right from wrong.
> Impaired judgment. I
>
> n the extreme, it is the persistent  desire  to  do wrong.  Those kinds of
> people are institutionalized  to protect society.
>
>
>
> Intelligence is effected by the physical structure (organic) make up of
> the brain.
>
> Genetic defects, and damage received in the womb and damage received
> during and after birth,  effects  the physical ability and speed of the
> brain to evaluate and process data.
>
> (Damage after birth includes verbal abuse, such as being told you are
> stupid and retarded and the like, especially relentlessly, for yrs.)
> (Emotional abuse, emotional malnourishment,  and abandonment also disable,
> break and rot the spirit.)
>
>
>
> There are 100s or maybe even 1000s of parts to the brain.
>
> Scientists are continuously making new discoveries in this area.
>
>
> Because each area of life is controlled by it's own brain  motor, people
> can be geniuses in some area (s)  and completely stupid in others. And
> everything in between. That is why you get savants.
>
> And often when a part or some parts of the brain are defective or damaged,
> other parts that are undamaged are often enhanced in ability.
>
>
>
> And I don't mind discussing my own case, in public,  because I hope I can
> enlighten people and also hopefully prevent some other children, through
> you the readers of this post,  from going through what I did.
>
> ( And I know very few people know this, that is understand the cause of
> mental illness and learning disabilities and emotional disorders,  etc. .)
>
> I grew up in an extremely abusive, suppressive, stupid, backward and
> insane home.
>
>
> I was so beat up and traumatized  as a child at home,  that when I was in
> school,  I had a very difficult time studying and absorbing what the
> teacher was teaching and was all but totally  unable to read my books and
> do my homework. My mind was numb from abuse.
>
> I was "pushed" through grades in school.
>
> The beatings I received caused extreme disorientation and confusion and a
> host of functional disorders.
>
> My brain would not work, much like a very slow  computer at the least,
> and often like a "frozen computer" in the extreme,  when I get stressed out.
>
> (And the garbage in- garbage out factor .)
>
> I would  get lost in school every day.
>
>  I had a very difficult time,  finding the right class room in the morning
> and between classes, or finding  the washroom.
>
> On real bad days,  I would wonder around the school hallways lost and
> looking for the right classroom and come late,  and on  real bad days,
> finally find the right class room,  when the class was over.
>
> (Sometimes I would remember to follow someone whom I knew was going to the
> same class as I was.)
>
> If I had to find the washroom,  it would some times  take a half hour to
> do so, sometimes the duration of the entire class time, on real bad days.
>
> And these were small schools.
>
> They were about  10 room schools.
>
> One school had about a 100 kids and the other had about 300.
>
> When I left home at 19,  I was so disoriented from beatings I had a
> difficult time walking a straight line.
>
> And this has been the case all my  life.
>
> This is called Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.  (PTSD)
>
> There are many types of PTSD.
>
> This is also a form of mental illness.
>
> I have been in PTSD therapy all my life, in order to survive  this far.
>
>
> Now here is another problem:
>
> When people see a physically handi- capped person, (physically disabled)
> such as a person in a wheel chair, or some one like Steven Hawkins, society
> goes out of their way to  assist and accommodate  them.
>
> They don't beat them or whip them because they cannot walk or run up
> stairs.
>
>
> But not all disabilities are visible.
>
> The brain is an organ or body part and can come (born)  defective, or get
> damaged or diseased, like any other body part.
>
> And the disconcerting or disheartening  thing about this  is that the the
> average person  does not have any understanding of this (this is called
> ignorance) and people with mental problems, metal disabilities are usually
> scoffed at, or scorned at, sneered at  and shunned.  Even physically abused.
>
> This is the height of ignorance. It is criminal.
>
>
> I spent my life trying in every way possible to over come the effects of
> child abuse.
>
> That was one of my strong points.
>
> I only got my first computer 10 yrs ago when I was 50.
>
> It was given to me.
>
> I used library, community  and working center computers for  a few yrs
> before that.
>
> Because of the effects of child abuse,  for the most part, I was never
> really able to hold a job  for longer than a few months to a yr.
>
> I have not been able to get married and have a family.
>
> I am basically afraid of people.
>
> Like a dog who has been severely and repeatedly  beaten.
>
> But I have learned to tolerate people for short periods of time, anyways.
>
> I have developed pretty good social veneer as a coping skill.
>
>
> And when it comes to computers,  they are not my strong point.
>
> I find them overwhelming, beyond web surfing and doing research on line
> and email.
>
> I can usually handle one, two or maybe  three variables.
>
> It is all relative  to other effecting factors and the complexity of the
> variables.
>
> But when it comes to situations  beyond that, I get overwhelmed and  my
> brain slows down, or  shuts down, like a computer with too many programs
> running.
>
> As you all well know,  the  speed and capacity of a computer is determined
> by the size, capacity  and quality of  it's components.   The brain is very
> similar.
>
> A computer is made  to duplicate the workings of the brain and mind as
> close as possible.
>
> And you all know the evolution of computers, from "the  stick to scratch
> in the sand" ,  to the abacus, to what we have today.
>
>
> So unless you have experienced such abuse, or concussions or have birth or
> genetic defects that cause  brain malfunction,  you have no real or
> meaningful  idea what mental problems  are like.
>
>
> My strong point is that I strive  to   think in terms of  how something
> can be done, instead of how something can't be done.
>
> I identify a problem and then look for the right answers, the right
> knowledge to solve the problem.
>
>
> I operate on the idea that there is an answer or solution to every problem.
>
> I have spent my entire  life in research on how to overcome the effects of
> abuse and mental illness.
>
> Few people would have survived what I did.
>
> Relatively speaking, I am far from a fully normal fully competent person,
> but I am a lot better than I used to be.
>
>
>
> The purpose of life is to become a master of it, to fulfill your full
> potential.
>
> How do you do that?
>
> You identify every problem you have, every defect you have, every disorder
> you have,  every disease you have,  and find the perfect solution for it.
>
> You identify every other type of life problem you have ( outside of
> yourself ) and find a perfect solution for it. (From relationships to
> business to what ever else,  to become the best there is in the field.
>
> The truth is nothing more or less than the right answer to every problem.
>
> Only the truth will solve your problems properly.
>
> There is no incurable disorder or disease, there are only incurable people
> with the wrong attutude.
>
> Or people operating on false and limiting knowledge or no knowledge.
>
> People fail in any endeavor for only one reason and that is for the lack
> of the right knowledge to solve the problem at hand.
>
> If you have the right knowledge,  you can solve any problem.
>
>
>
> The biggest room in the world,  is room for improvement.
>
> The building of a noble character is job that is never completed.
>
>
>
>
>
> In hope I have enlightened some people on this list.
>
> If anyone wants any more information on this subject,  you can contact me
> back channel.
>
> Because at least 30% of society has some form of mental illness or mental
> problems.
>
> Probably closer to 50%.
>
> I have never met a person who, I thought could not use some form of mind
> improvement.
>
> It is all a matter of degree.
>
>
>
> Mental illness by any other name,  is still mental illness.
>
> And there are  almost as many types of mental illness as there are people.
>
> The best science can do is categorize them.
>
>
> And I am sure there is a cure for every type.
>
> But this field is still in it's infancy.
>
>
> Have a great day,
>
> David
>
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> https://lists.ubuntu.com/mailman/listinfo/ubuntu-ca
>
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>


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