RANT: sound on Linux is EVIL

[D. Michael McIntyre]

DISCLAIMER: I'm ranting, plain and simple.  I'm not asking for help.  I've 
been helping people with this very issue for years, and if I can't figure it 
out, money says you can't figure it out either.

Sound.  Sound is so evil.

"Honey, here's what I'm going to do.  I'm going to rip all your CDs to the 
hard drive so you don't clutter the den up with stacks of plastic.  Then you 
can play them right off the computer like a jukebox.  Does that sound cool?"

"Um.  I guess.  It depends on how hard it is to play them."

"Oh.  It's really easy.  Look."

Click, click, click.

Silence.

An hour later, my wife left in disgust about 50 minutes ago, and I still DON'T 
HAVE A PEEP OUT OF THIS DAMN COMPUTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It ran for 90 days or something, but I shut it off to go out of town.  I came 
back, booted, and boom.  No sound.  I have no freaking idea what's wrong.

What the hell COULD be wrong?  I only have one kernel.  I built it myself.  It 
ran for three months, and everything was good and perfect with the universe.  
I turn off my computer, and everything goes all to hell.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-- 
D. Michael McIntyre